Hello my beautiful people,
Last time we interacted I wrote a blog about all my self discoveries, and the hardships I was going through. On “Take Charge”, I wrote about things we can do to take control over our lives by making small decisions that make a big impact in our lives. I have been MIA for a while in somewhat “typical Jenny” kind of fashion.
I decided to follow my plan, or should I say follow my own advice. I let go of toxic relationships (friends, coworkers, and relatives). I decided to take care of my health, and learning to love myself every step of the way. It may sound easy to some, but when you have been brainwashed to try to fit some type of beauty standard all of your life…it’s truly one of the hardest things to do. I will be lying if, I said it’s not something I’m still working on.
Consider this my follow up, here is what I have found since following my own advice. I learned that by learning to love myself in every aspect I also allowed myself to be loved by those around me. I let go of having too much pride (still tries to take over at times) that now I let friends and family know when I need their help or time. Most importantly I stopped trying to take control of things I have no control over, and decided to fully trust God in those things I cannot. I learned my love languages, so now I know what is important for me in my relationships. This also allowed me to let myself fall in love with someone other than myself.
I have realized that what you put out in to the universe is what will come back to you. In my last post I spoke about happiness being a choice, and trust me when you realize that it changes EVERYTHING. Every decision I started making since I wanted change revolves around “happiness”, and “will this make me happy?”.
I took a big risk this year. I was somewhere really draining for 3+ years, the only reason I stayed was because I was comfortable. I kept hearing that I couldn’t find a better place to be then there. That “I would never find those benefits anywhere else”, so I stayed. I listened to everyone and was truly unhappy. It was a toxic relationship. It was even starting to affect my health. I would get anxiety, and I felt my blood pressure rise. I finally asked myself, “will staying make me happier than leaving?” When I knew the answer, I took action. I didn’t even look back.
Now, I’m 10 pounds lighter from working out everyday. Stress-free from leaving a comfortable place, and excited about starting a new refreshing challenge ahead. I am happy because I choose to be happy despite little bumps on the road, because you don’t park your car when you reach a speed bump you just proceed with caution (or full speed ahead! It’s your car not mine lol I mean life). I also chose love. To love and be let loved.
Every morning, I made it a thing to wake up and thank God for at least three things that I’m grateful for, and pray for the things (or people) that I have had on my mind that are out of my control. Today, I’m grateful for another day of life, my family (friends and Neymar 🐕 included, and for love.
Happy Valentine’s Day! ❤️